~Chapter 4~

Three hours later, it was eight o’clock PM. The sun had set, taking its nightly slumber, and the round, full moon had taken its place in the sky. As Casavir and Raina walked together to the Blue Palace under the starry abyss, he was careful to move slowly with her so she wouldn’t accidentally trip over her gown. Fortunately, Raina was so graceful, she made walking in it seem effortless. In fact, her pace matched his own, and he couldn’t help but smile to himself as they got closer to the plaza where the ballroom entrance was. Of course, he knew his smile was because of much more than that. The moon cast a white, effervescent glow over Raina’s skin, making it appear milkier and smoother than usual. She looked so absolutely beautiful because of it, it made it even harder for him not to gaze at her. Still, he knew he had to. Tempting fate was never a good idea. It only led to heartache, at least it had in his experience.

“Casavir?” Raina asked, the pair of them now a few feet away from the palace.

“Yes, my Lady?”

“Are you cross with me?” she asked, her sweet voice dripping with concern and sadness. The sound of it penetrated Casavir’s soul, stabbing it like a sharp dagger.

“Of course not!” he replied, darting his eyes quickly to her. “Why in Sovengarde would you think such a dreadful thing?”

“Well,” she began, her cheeks tinging pink with embarrassment. “You haven’t uttered a single word to me or looked at me since we left the shop. You didn’t even speak to me when we were at the Skeever getting ready. I thought I had done something to anger you.”

Feeling his heart stiffen with pain, Casavir’s brows bowed inwards. Well played, Cas, he thought, irritated. He’d never meant to upset her. He’d refrained from having as many interactions with her as possible in order to prevent himself from being tempted by her. Unfortunately, it seemed to have the side effect of hurting her feelings. I’m going to have to change my tactics, he thought. He couldn’t very well continue letting her believe he was shunning her. That was wrong and not his intention. “My apologies, Raina,” he said. “Please trust me when I say we are absolutely fine. I could never harbor any ill will towards you,” he assured her, imbuing his eyes with the utmost sincerity.

At that, she smiled and let out a heavy breath. “Thank the Gods! I would never want you to be mad at me,” she said, looking ahead again at the palace. “Especially tonight. I am certainly going to need you.”

“Why is that?” he asked, rubbing his hand over her gloved one as they proceeded up the hill.

“I can’t dance,” she said, chuckling nervously under her breath. “I have two left feet and my balance can be atrocious in heels. You’re going to have to help me.”

Laughing a little, Casavir’s lips widened. “Oh,” he replied. Hearing such news surprised him. She seemed to be so graceful as she walked, he couldn’t imagine she was a poor dancer. Regardless, he was happy to be there for her. “Fret not, my Lady. The art of dancing was instilled in me as part of my Paladin training. I am sure I will be able to assist you.”

“That’s good,” she said. “Dancing was part of my training too, only not as a Paladin. When I was younger, I was bred for something else entirely.”

Intrigued, he looked at her. “What might that be, if I may ask?”

Moving her eyes back to him, they burned with foul disdain. “A nobleman’s wife.”

Instantly, as if her words were a bevy of arrows flying a million miles an hour, his chest felt punctured by each and every one of them. Suddenly, his mind went black and he froze in place, feeling a rush of fear and pain course through his being. I could never love you, Casavir, the memories of a woman with wavy, blonde hair and brown eyes cried. He still remembered her as if it had happened yesterday, even though it had been several years ago now. She had her head in her hands as she shook in front of him, totally unhinged and consumed with grief. I will never forgive you and I will never be your wife, do you hear me? Never! As he recalled the memory, his body broke out into a cold sweat and his heart began to race uncontrollably. “I am so sorry,” he mumbled, staring out into space. All he could see was darkness. “Please, forgive me!”

“Casavir, what’s wrong?” a feminine voice asked. It sounded hollow and miles away. He could barely hear her, but he could detect her concern and desperation to get his attention. He then began to feel something pressing into his arm, dragging him back into the present. “Casavir!” the woman repeated. “Speak to me. Whatever is the matter? Forgive you for what?”

Giving his head a firm shake, he began to recognize the woman’s voice. It was Raina’s, and she sounded worried to pieces. Breathing quickly, he looked to his side and saw her standing there, gripping his forearm and staring at him with anxious, panic-stricken eyes. Her dark blue irises pulsated as she watched him, frantic for him to say something. “I am so sorry, my Lady,” he said, grabbing her lightly by the shoulders. “I do not know what came over me. Please, excuse my outburst.”

“It’s quite all right,” she said, her voice slowly becoming more relaxed as she caressed him. Her tender, rhythmic strokes put him at ease immediately. He felt his nerves calm and his veins thaw from the cold chill the memory thrust onto them, making him feel more like himself. “Are you okay now?” she asked.

“Yes,” he replied, nodding. “I am fine. I assure you. I apologize for alarming you.”

“No need to apologize. I’m just glad you’re fine now,” she replied. Drawing a deep breath, she then ceased her caresses and broke away from him. She still seemed concerned, but her facial muscles weren’t nearly as tense as before. Watching her walk away, Casavir felt terrible for worrying her so, but he was also struck with anxiety about where she was going. Looking around, a quick scan of their surroundings revealed to him they had arrived at the plaza outside the ballroom. By the Gods, he thought, unnerved by how utterly unaware he had been of their location. I cannot permit that to happen again. He couldn’t afford to be distracted and lose his sense of reality as he just did. He was in the presence of Raina now and if anything should try to harm her at the ball tonight, he knew he had to be ready to defend her. Then again, he understood that she was perfectly able to care for herself should any calamity befall her, but he didn’t want her having to perform such a deed alone. He wanted to prove that he was capable and that he could be relied on should she need him. In addition, it was his duty as a Paladin to defend those who were good and honorable. Raina certainly fit that description – along with many other ones.

“Casavir, come here please. I want to introduce you to someone,” Raina called out to him from across the way. Standing beside her was a medium built man with bulging muscles protruding from a russet tunic lined with a fur collar. His gray hair was pulled back in braids that Casavir surmised he did himself. They appeared far from professionally done, for they had several strands hanging out of the ribbon that was meant to keep them in place and he had frizz on the top of his head. Nevertheless, he appeared stately and regal enough to get away with his less than immaculate appearance. He must be a nobleman, Casavir guessed. Picking up his feet, he walked towards them and extended his hand out. The man extended his own back, giving him a nice, strong shake. As he did, Casavir stared into his jet-black eyes. They were seasoned, experienced, and there were deep bags under them with small scars that littered his face. This man has seen battle, Casavir ascertained as he released his hand, satisfied with their greeting.

“This is the esteemed Thane of Eastmarch, Brynolf Vandermeer,” Raina said. “Sir Vandermeer, this is Casavir. He’s a Paladin with the Order.”

“A pleasure to meet you,” Casavir said, bowing his head in respect.

“Oh, there’s no need for that, boy,” Brynolf replied, waving him off. His voice was husky and raspy, and he began coughing as soon as he spoke. For a moment, Casavir considered offering him his handkerchief, but he did not want to be rude. Clearing his throat, Brynolf eventually came to and looked back at him. “The joys of gettin’ older,” he said, shaking his head. “I swear, the Gods are no more merciful to an old man than those blasted dragons that are attackin’ our villages.”

“Your villages?” Casavir asked.

“Yes,” Raina intervened. “Sir Vandermeer and the rest of Eastmarch have had terrible problems with dragons and the like of late. Half of their towns have been decimated and the ones that have been spared are suffering from citizens fleeing further to the south in hopes of keeping themselves and their children safe. If you ask me, I think it is horribly tragic. They are literally being uprooted from their homes for fear of losing their lives.”

“Yes,” Casavir nodded. “I must concur. That is horrible.”

“Of that, we’re all agreed,” Brynolf said, scratching under his thick, burly mustache. “And I swear, those blasted Stormcloaks make it all ten times worse! They’ve set up camp in some of the abandoned villages. They’ve been forcin’ the remainin’ shopkeepers and the tavern owners to basically hand over their stocks, free of charge, in order to supply their little rebellion. It makes me sick!”

“I can appreciate why,” Casavir said. “There is no excuse for what they are doing, be it in your territories or any other.”

“You got that right, son!” Brynolf said. “That’s why me and my men are gonna do somethin’ about it ‘for they can do anymore damage by gettin’ to Windhelm!”

Raising a brow, Casavir shifted in place. “You’re going to strike at them?” he asked.

“Indeed we are!” he said, thumping his chest with his fist. “We’ve had enough. It’s time somethin’ be done about it once and for all. If the Legion and the Empire won’t send anymore men to help us, then it’s about time we take it on ourselves to get the job done. No more lollygaggin’, I say!”

“You do have a point. You cannot continue to stand idly by while your lands are being ravaged,” Raina replied as she looped her arm back around Casavir’s. “Would you like some extra swords and shields by your side when you strike, by the way? I myself would love to help and I know Casavir here would as well. He’s my companion.”

What? Stunned, Casavir couldn’t believe what he just heard. Throwing his head to the side, he stared down at her. She wants me to travel with her, he thought, his eyes nearly boggling out of their sockets. The notion of it was certainly pleasurable to him. It definitely beat traveling alone, but he was absolutely shocked that she wanted to do such a thing.

“He happens to have connections with the Legion,” she confidently continued. “They are allies of his Order and I’m certain he could obtain some intelligence that would prove useful to you.” She then gave his arm a squeeze and turned to look up at him, smiling with a slight twinkle in her eyes that was both mischievous and charming. “And if he doesn’t mind me saying so, he also has wonderful technique with a blade.”

Blushing, Casavir felt his cheeks burn with the heat of a thousand suns. It pleased him greatly that she thought he was skilled in combat, but her statement to Sir Vandermeer was still dishonest. She’d never actually seen him in battle before, but given the look in her eyes, he supposed that wasn’t the point. She was attempting to be shrewd in dealing with the gentleman so that he would allow him to help. Although Casavir disliked the approach, he could sense that the gentleman had an unfavorable view of the Legion due to their lack of commitment to securing his lands. Raina probably detected that as well and wanted to give Brynolf extra incentive to permit him in his company. Before he could give it any further thought, however, Brynolf tossed his hand squarely onto his shoulder and tightened his fingers around his steel pauldrons.

“Well Ms. Rockchester, if you’re vouchin’ for this man, who am I to say no? Course you two can join us. I’ll have my courier send you instructions in the comin’ days.” He then took his hand off and turned around, facing the door to the ballroom. Reaching up, he clutched his furry collar and beamed proudly. “We’ll make those dag nab blowhards hurt so bad, their ancestors will feel it in their graves!” The sound of his boisterous laugh thundered through the plaza, making some of the passing ball attendees glace at him. He didn’t seem to notice though. He appeared too caught up in the grandeur of his battle fantasies to give it much concern.

“Excellent, Sir Vandermeer,” Raina said. “We will await news from you with fervent anticipation. In the meantime, might I suggest you go inside and spend some time with your wife? I hear she enjoys dancing and she wouldn’t want to miss the bards’ songs tonight. I’m told they’re some of her favorites from the college.”

At that, Brynolf faced her and nodded. “Aye. That be true, my Lady. She’ll peck my eyes out if I be late to that. She does love to dance so, and Oblivion will have to freeze over before I let some other man hold her in his arms.”

“You best get in there quickly, then,” Raina said, smiling kindly at him.

“Yes indeed,” he replied. Bending down, he grabbed her hand gently and planted a kiss on her knuckles. There was nothing the least bit romantic about it, but it still made Casavir cringe inside. How he hated any man touching her, in even the slightest degree! Nevertheless, he knew he had to maintain his composure. She had gone out on a limb for him and he did not want to fail her by appearing uncouth, especially in front of the nobles of whom he needed to make a good impression. Skyrim’s future was at stake and he did not want to jeopardize his ability to help those in need of his services. He and Sir Vandermeer then exchanged brief nods of farewell before Brynolf made his way towards the doors and disappeared amongst the small group of other well-dressed patrons entering the ballroom.

“I apologize if that was forward or inappropriate of me,” Raina said, moving in front of him so he could see her. “But all of that really was the best way. I know I’ve never actually seen you in battle before, but Brynolf has had issues with the Legion since a squad of his was killed because they refused to send reinforcements. He blames the Legion for their deaths. I didn’t want him taking it out on you by refusing your aid. I know how important it is for you to further your aims here and I didn’t want him putting a stop to that.”

Staring down at her, he considered her for a moment. He appreciated her commitment to assisting him. More than that, though, he couldn’t help but understand her methods. He didn’t approve of them but given his own background, he knew that dealing with the nobility sometimes required a deft, if sometimes dishonest, touch. It wasn’t ideal, but it was for the greater good and he truly had no malicious intent. He honestly did want to help any way he could. “You have my thanks for that,” he said. Sighing, he then looked away from her and crossed his arms. He didn’t like the distasteful way she had gotten Brynolf to allow him to help, but he was too experienced with the nobility to be this bothered by the demands of interacting with them. No, it had to be something else, and he had a hunch he knew what it was. “My Lady?” he asked, turning back around to face her.

“Yes?” she asked, smoothing out the front of her gown.

“Were you sincere when you told him I was your companion?” The words tasted sour as they left his lips, but they had to be asked. Her telling Sir Vandermeer that could’ve been merely another part of her ruse to help strengthen her case for letting him be apart of their strike on the Stormcloaks. He had to be sure, and it surprised him how much every fiber of his being yearned to hear her say that she had indeed told the truth. As he waited on baited breath for her response, she reached up and cupped his upper arm, smiling at him politely and yet with the same anticipation that imbued his own spirit in this very moment.

“I certainly was,” she said. “I would love nothing more than for you to travel with me full-time after tonight. I would consider it a privilege, actually. That is up to you, however.”

As if his lungs had been renewed, he felt the air return to them and his heart thud with excitement. Dear Gods, he thought, feeling himself bubble over inside. She truly did mean it. Stepping away from her, he swallowed hard, feeling a lump develop in his throat. She’ll be with me at all hours, he thought. That beautiful frame, those thick, pouty lips, and above all, that brilliant, cunning mind, would be his to behold every day and every night from here on. The very concept of it nearly brought him to his knees, and he suddenly found himself lacking the confidence that he could manage being in her presence that frequently. But then, he remembered the discomfort he felt when Brynolf kissed her hand mere moments ago and when Bishop was pawing at her like the abominable beast he was. No, he thought to himself, feeling a knot tighten deep down in his gut. He couldn’t let that happen. Raina had to be under his care and his alone. I will control myself, he thought. I can and I must. With a deeply drawn breath, he looked back at her and smiled. Not enough to appear overly excited, but enough to let her know he was enthused. “Of course, my Lady,” he said. “It would be my pleasure.”

As soon as he accepted her invitation, her lips spread apart into a dazzling array of blinding white teeth. From how excited she seemed, Casavir was convinced that she might leap into his arms, but she quickly drew back, sensing how inappropriate she was being. “I’m very pleased to hear that,” she said, clearly tempering her voice. Her efforts at cordiality and control made Casavir chuckle under his breath. He felt the same elation, however, and he wondered if perhaps his laugh was because of his own excitement rather than hers. Nonetheless, he was careful not to let it show too much.

“Well, now that we have that settled, I do believe we have a dance to attend,” she said, offering her hand out to him. Her glove adorned fingers wiggled as she waited for him to grab them. She seemed so sweet, so happy, and Casavir instinctively felt his arm lift and his fingers curl around hers. Once they were safely nestled in his hand, she led them towards the ballroom door. He wasn’t sure what to expect when they arrived inside, but one thing he was absolutely certain of: it wouldn’t be the last night he’d spend with the fair Lady Raina. There would be many, many more, and he would have to be prepared for each and every one of them.